Inmates Escape as Brazilian Guards Expect 'Orgy'

A rather interesting story has popped up in the news about an unusual jailbreak that occurred at the Nova Mutum public jail near Cuiaba in central Brazil. It seems one of the inmates, Bruno Amorim, 18, who was in jail on a robbery and attempted murder conviction, convinced his girlfriend and a couple of her friends to put on some rather skimpy clothing and invite the guards to party together. The idea was to offer them some spiked booze, and when they passed out, grab the cell keys and "vámonos" together.


Police found the three guards naked and handcuffed the next morning after the breakout. The women appear to have donned black lingerie and dominatrix police uniforms and convinced the guards they were going to have a wild orgy. 

Apparently the gals were pretty convincing and the guards reportedly were eager to walk away from their posts and accompany the girls to the staff's sleeping quarters.

However, after a few sips of the gals' spiked drinks, the guards passed out and none of them could remember a thing the next morning when they were found handcuffed and drugged. One was found dizzy while another was still sound asleep by late afternoon.

The prisoners escaped taking several 12 caliber shotguns and some 38 caliber pistols along with ammunition. Meanwhile, the three seductresses left behind several articles of black lingerie and their dominatrix police uniforms.

The prison guards have have been arrested and charged with "facilitating a jailbreak" along with "culpable embezzlement."

A few photos of one the naked guards were apparently leaked by amused police officers and uploaded to social media sites.

"Nut Rage" Korean Air Daughter Gets Prison Sentence

You might remember the news story a few months ago about this high-and-mighty young woman, the oldest daughter of the owner of Korean Air Lines, was on a KAL flight getting ready to take off from JFK in New York when she forced the plane to turn around because she was served some macadamia nuts in a bag instead of on a dish.

Cho Hyun-ah, the oldest daughter of Korean Airlines chairman Cho Yang-ho, treated the airline staff like "feudal slaves," according to court documents, when she ordered the airline's chief flight attendant off the plane after demanding that the guy read over the airline's proper nut-handling guidelines.

It seems the incident created quite a stir in South Korea and since forcing a flight to change its route, obstructing the flight's captain, forcing crew members off a plane along with assaulting an airline crew member are all legitimate criminal offenses, she's now been sentenced by a South Korean court to serve a not-so-comfortable one-year term in the slammer.

In court, Cho wiped away tears and expressing remorse but the court showed little mercy in sentencing the heiress, much to the glee of the courtroom audience since incidents like this have usually been dismissed in South Korea where most of the economy is dominated by family-run conglomerates that historically have been able to act above the law.

Instructional Video with Dancing Genitals Draws Fire

Well, the liberal Swedes are at it again. Sweden's  public broadcasting network SVT has created a television series about the human body and, naturally, they got around to the part where men and women do the, er, you know. And they put together a sweet little animated video featuring a dancing representation of the male part with a mustache and a lovely lady-like dancing representation of the female part with long eyelashes. (I seriously doubt if we'll see the show or the promotional video over here on PBS ;-}.)

Guess what? The video is drawing criticism for not being progressive enough. Huh? The show's producers thought that many parents would find it a great way to explain about these private parts to children aged 3-6 or so.  Some Swedes, however, thought portraying the male part with a mustache and the female part with long eyelashes reinforced gender stereotyping. 

The show's producer said the video was designed to be fun and was not intended to be a "statement on gender politics." Meanwhile, it seems the video has been viewed by something in excess of around four million viewers so far on YouTube.

Je suis Charlie!

Top Gun Aircraft Carrier Scrapped for a Penny

Ah, another great use of our tax dollars, or maybe we should make that tax "cents" instead.

Remember "Top Gun?" Of course you do! Well, Tom Cruise's favorite aircraft carrier, the USS Ranger, the one he was featured in when he made the movie, "Top Gun," has been scrapped by the Navy. Some people wanted to set it up as a museum but they couldn't raise the money, so the Navy has sold it for, are you ready? One penny! What a deal! I would have given them twice that, although I'm not sure what I would have done with a 66,000 ton doorstop.

The massive ship has been sitting in Bremerton, Washington, for about 8 years waiting for donations to pour in for the museum, but they needed about $35 million to set everything up and raised only about $100,000, so that idea was out.

The Ranger is one of only four Forrestal-class carriers the Navy completed. Built in 1957, the ship served extensively in the Vietnam War and Operation Desert Storm until being decommissioned in 1993.

The folks who'll be tearing it down for scrap, All Star Metals, are having it towed to their facility in Brownsville, Texas. That will take something like 5 months since they'll have to take it around the tip of South America through the Straits of Magellan, since it's too big to go through the Panama Canal.

Poop in a Box: Black Friday Special!

Remember Black Friday? Several million of us got online and bought stuff at great prices, right? Well, some others, about 30,000 or so, bought something absolutely insane, some possibly thinking it was something else instead of what it said it was, but in any case, everybody got it. And what was this insane something? The answer is ... are you ready? Bull sh*t! (replace the "*" with "i" if you aren't offended ;-})

Yup. There's a game manufacturer called Cards Against Humanity, and they have built a pretty strong following by offering people stuff that's politically incorrect or maybe taboo in some cultures. Their concept is to choose something funny or offensive, and that's what they did. They packaged some small piles of the stuff in a nice little box and sold it online on Black Friday.

When they announced the “offer,” some of their following thought they'd be getting something else, but they got exactly what the box said, according to Max Temkin, one of the company's co-founders. As a matter of fact, the company went out of its way to tell potential customers that what they'd be getting was going to be, in fact, the actual stuff, poop. 

Here's a video from YouTube of a client opening his own personal box:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57y1Ryr66cM

Billion Dollar Surveillance Blimps to Launch over Maryland

No it's not a blimp with a goiter, it's the latest government boondoggle! Another wild and crazy way to spend your hard earned tax dollars in the most bizarre ways possible. This time it's the US Army's turn as they're going to launch two massive billion dollar surveillance blimps and station them directly over Maryland. 

Yup, you heard it right, these gargantuan pregnant balloons are going to be sitting up in the sky to protect us against flying white elephants from Congress - no, silly - they're designed to protect us from a potential barrage of enemy missiles that might somehow be launched by evil villains presumably lying in wait off the Atlantic coast aimed at Washington or wherever.

It's the last remnant of an 18-year-long Army project, costing us $2.8-billion, originally designed to warn us against enemy cruise missiles or the like,  but some are saying they'll probably be spending a lot more time instead looking at cars, trucks and the boats of taxpayers who paid for the things.

It's a project called "JLENS," which is an abbreviation for “Joint Land Attack Cruise Missile Defense Elevated Netted Sensor System.” It has high-resolution radar coverage of up to about 340 miles in every direction which means it will be able to see from North Carolina to Massachusetts and thwart those evil do-badders right in their steps.

Things could have been worse. When the things were originally planned, there were supposed to be three dozen of them, but apparently some of them crashed and costs escalated (Really? In Washington?) and they gave up on making any more than just the two prototypes they'd already built.

So, in a couple of days if you're driving up I-95 northeast of Washington, you'll be able to look up in the sky and it won't be a bird or a plane you'll see, but the mother of all blimps silently guarding you day and night at 10,000 feet above the Maryland countryside. They're about 240 feet long, about three times the size of a regular Goodyear blimp, so they'll be pretty hard to miss.